Lucky you're listening this morning. Got an important meeting today? Ill-prepared? Still sleepy, or still dazed and confused from the weekend? Well then, we're here to help with...
7 Ways to Seem Smarter than you Actually Are at Business Meetings!
1. Walk in late. Lets your co-workers know that you've got some really important stuff on your plate. While everyone will assume that you were with higher-ups plotting corporate strategy before your grand (late) entrance, you were actually chatting up that embarrassing thing that intern did at the company party last weekend.
2. Ask, "Will this benefit the user?" When your coffee finally kicks in, and you realize you have no idea whatsoever what everyone is talking about, pound on the table and ask, "Whoa guys, what this really comes down to is the user. Will this benefit the user?" Settle back into your chair. Relax while everyone else jumps in.
3. Do math. Quick math skills are essential in fooling most of the people all of the time. Try, "So if the click through rate on that ad in June was .25% and .75% in July, then that's a 200% increase in performance." Doesn't matter if the numbers don't add up, not if you move so fast that everyone believes that you know what you're talking about.
4. Reference your "impressive" network. Tell them you just had cocktails with so-and-so and that he or she would be happy to come to the next meeting to share some insights. Are they gonna check?
5. See that whiteboard. Use it. Start a brainstorming session while everyone is looking at you. Say things like, "Think outside the box." and "What else?" while offering no ideas of your own. Easy.
6. Use industry lingo. Try this. "They served us 25,000 impressions at a $10 CPM and we got 500 clicks, so they paid an eCPC of $5. While the team decides how to optimize for this new info, you can go back to daydreaming.
And, most important of all...
7. Take a call. Throw an apologetic glance around the room and excuse yourself to take that call. While chatting with the pizza delivery man, your colleagues will be envious that you have more pressing responsibilities than the meeting at hand.
Listen in this morning and...wait, I've got to take this call...DaveT